the intro is not the same without colton’s penis
this is still the best story ever told at a talk show
I still do not even know what 5sos look like
do not read old chat logs of someone you used to be close to do not read old chat logs of someone you used to be close to do not read old chat logs of someone you used to be close to
everywhere is a bed if you try hard enough
ok like u cant force hook ups
u have to go with his vibe and let him make the moves
but let him know you’re into him and like flirt with him. (im kina shyish so this is easier when im drunk) but talk to him and laugh at his jokes and tease him but dont only pay attention to him. make him want u, go talk to other guys but give him the most attention.
i normally let him make allll the moves but if i know he def wants to hook up and the time is right ill be like wanna go somewhere and then boom bam u got laid
i know i give white people a lot of shit but u guys are really nice. like when the light turns green and there’s a white pedestrian that’s almost across the street u guys always do that jog thing. i know it’s kind of insignificant but i appreciate it white people. u and ur half jog thing.
i think about this post every time i do the half jog thing
OKAY SO ALMOST 2 MONTHS AGO OUR ENGLISH TEACHER FORCED US TO ENTER A POETRY CONTEST AND I WAS ABOUT TO ENTER A POEM WHEN IT TRIED TO FORCE ME TO GIVE IT A TITLE SO IN A FIT OF RAGE I WROTE A NEW POEM COMPLAINING ABOUT THE TITLE REQUIREMENT
AND TODAY I WENT TO CHECK MY EMAIL AND I??????
YOU ARE LITERALLY PUBLISHING AN INSULT TO YOUR OWN RULES BUT OKAY I GUESS IF GETTING TALKED DOWN TO TURNS YOU ON SOMEHOW AND I GET PUBLISHED I’VE GOT NO COMPLAINTS HERE?
Everything about this post is perfect. Because growing up is for losers.